God, Grant Me
This is a meme -read the following headers- I see very often these days. I have to remind myself of its validity from time to time. Even though I am not a religious guy, I believe there's a higher force that is present in all matter and in all life. Thus I am going to refer to this higher force as 'God', even though I don't think there is some devine entity that steers the fate of all things and living creatures. Alright, let's not get too philosophical here. Let's start with a lesson I've learned in my early years and that I like to challenge every once in a while:
The Strength to Accept the Things I Cannot Change
People usually learn this lesson the hard way in school. I gained the impression -actually still valid to this day- that the German school system is majorly flawed in its concept, that it is the mission of education to make young people memorize knowledge instead of understanding concepts. I still have those in/famous rhetorical questions of various teachers in my head:"...and do you think you will always have a calculator at hand?" or "And how do you think you will know <<insert random knowledge, like 'the difference between osmosis and diffusion'>> if you have not memorized the definition? Will you carry around with you all the literature on earth?". Later in professional life there were even more occasions, where I was left with no other choice but to accept things and to move on with my life. My favorite mantra for such situations was coined in the US-Navy:"Embrace the suck!", which is approximately the same as a quip in the local dialect: "Et is, wie et is.", meaning that you'll just have to accept certain things the way they are. There's one very important supplement I would like to add, that makes all the difference:"...and move on.". This tiny supplement is of paramount importance, as this will translate a temporary frustration into forward momentum. Skip the shit and move on to something different. Maybe it's crap again that you'll encounter, but it's going to be a different kind of crap, until eventually -at some miraculous point- you'll steer clear of the crap - Hallelujah!
The Courage to Change the Things I Can
You have to love it: change things as much as you can. Do things differently - sometimes just for variety's sake. This is not everyone's cup of tea. Try to see the opportunity to alter and to change things as the only true privilege -maybe even obligation- in life. What is life without the chance to take important decisions and to follow up on them with deliberate action?
After I finished school I had a few months idle time and I took a job as a replacement postman. I loved the job: getting up early, sorting the mail, packing the cargo bike and heading out to deliver the mail. I could not have imagined a better job that demands no further qualification whatsoever. In the beginning I was sluggishly slow and took until late afternoon to get finished. However I quickly familiarized with my route, my area, managed to memorize the names on the post boxes and was able to get up to speed quickly. As soon as I was able to finish with the regular staff I soon wanted more: I asked myself how I could finish my route even quicker and arrived at the conclusion that it would take a bold move to be able to impress the pros on their home turf. One day when I was able to finish earlier than expected I took the time to reorganize the entire route. I changed the entire plan so that I would avoid going the same streets multiple times, avoid crowded venues and traffic most of the time and reduce wait time while en route. Also I would start with the high-rise buildings and thus be able to ride with less cargo for the major part of the tour, which was mainly one and two party houses. My upfront investment for the trick was an entire day of prolonged work ending in a late shift. It was worth it though as I regularly was able to finish work before most of my colleagues. Unfortunately the colleague I had temporarily replaced was not much amused that I had completely changed the route he had gotten used to over many years.
The Wisdom to Know the Difference
Easier said than done. How are you supposed to know which is which unless you haven't tried to change things? How are you supposed to accept things that simply seem unacceptable to you? Acceptance takes strength, that is true. So the question must be: Which are the things that take less strength: to accept or to change it? I am constantly working on my wisdom and I learned this: anything that you desire so much, that you are willing to sacrifice a significant amount of your time, sweat and maybe even blood to achieve, you can and will achieve. This is why focus is key. Focus does not come naturally - you have to train it. We are easily distracted in our everyday lives - in modern life distractions and temptations are lurking everywhere. Focus and stay focused on the few things you desire most. This way you will be able to change things. Simply let all things that you're not burning for blur out of focus. You'll just have to learn to care less, or not care at all and to be entirely indifferent to certain things. This way you'll accept them more easily: by simply not giving a shit.
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